Episode 320: Your Next Chapter: Finding Magic in Your Own Timeline

Episode 320_ Your Next Chapter_ Finding Magic in Your Own Timeline.mp3: Audio automatically transcribed by Sonix

Episode 320_ Your Next Chapter_ Finding Magic in Your Own Timeline.mp3: this mp3 audio file was automatically transcribed by Sonix with the best speech-to-text algorithms. This transcript may contain errors.

Speaker1:
What if your greatest learning in 2025 came from slowing down, observing more, and noticing layers that you've not ever even looked at before?

Speaker2:
Podcasting from a little cabin on a hill. This is the Stacy Westfall podcast. Stacy's goal is simple to teach you to understand why horses do what they do, as well as the action steps for creating clear, confident communication with your horses.

Speaker1:
Happy New Year and welcome to season 25! I have to say, I love that season 25 is beginning in the year 2025. When something lines up like that, it's one of those little things that I appreciate. It makes me think of a couple times in my freestyle reining routines, where I planned the major transitions for what I was going to do with my routine, but some of the smaller musical timing accidentally lined up so it looks planned. But I know that I didn't plan it. And this idea, the idea of planning big things and then leaving room for that magic, the coincidences that God incidences to happen. It's a great summary of how I view the New Year goal setting. In this episode, I want to share with you a thought that I had during 2024 that shifted my thinking. I'll share with you how this came to be, why it resonated so deeply, and most importantly, why I think it could be valuable for you to hear about for your own horsemanship journey. Earlier in 2024, I was on a zoom call teaching. I do a lot of teaching using zoom. Some of it is free teaching that I do with webinars, and other times it's meetings with individuals or inside of my programs, like my Resourceful Writer program.

Speaker1:
And one of the huge benefits that I get from this is that I get a chance to explain things from different angles. You hear me doing that on the podcast? I do it even more so week after week in these meetings, and I personally enjoy the challenge of approaching a subject from as many different angles as necessary to help students understand what I'm teaching. On this day, I was simply expanding on something that I've said many times before, both here on the podcast and in other areas when I'm teaching, and that is that. My life long, let's even call it a mission statement, is to learn all I can about horses. The pursuit of this has led me Into many different areas in the horse industry. It has led me into cult starting and showing trail riding, training horses to pull carts, teaching horses tricks, working with problem horses, training horses to compete in specific performance events like reining or ranch riding or western dressage, or taking bridleless riding to a very high level in freestyle reining. On the day that I made this statement, I was simply trying to help the people on that call understand what I meant by learn all I can, because I understand that learn all I can is still vague.

Speaker1:
So if you go way back in the podcast and you listen to the one that I recorded on Smart goals, which means they need to be specific, measurable, actionable, relevant, and time bound, it doesn't really fit that, which is why it's a little bit more of like a mission statement. And it's supposed to be it's a direction. And then I make it more specific inside of smaller time frames. For example, one year I set the goal of showing at the Western Dressage World show, and then I layered that. So in order to reach my year end goal of showing at the Western Dressage World Show, I also wanted to show in classical or traditional dressage along the way, so that I would end the year understanding both. The goal of showing at the Western Dressage World Show was specific and measurable, and even the plan to show in traditional dressage along the way was also specific and measurable. And both of these fit under the umbrella that I have of learn all I can, which again, is more of a mission statement because it points me in a.

Speaker3:
In.

Speaker1:
But it's also far less measurable. I see goal setting as a dance between. That intention or mission statement and measurable steps. On the day that I was teaching. I said, I want to learn more in the next four years than I did in my four years at college. And the minute I said it right in the middle of teaching, I was very aware that something shifted. That statement I want to learn more in the next four years than I did in my four years of college, was said to benefit those on the call, and it also stopped me in my tracks because even as I said it, I instantly felt the next question pop up in my mind. How could I learn more now than I did in those foundational, transforming years of college? I should pause here to remind everyone that although I grew up riding, I was not a very educated rider when I entered college. I went to an equine college, and before that I was educated more by the school of hard knocks than I was by formal education. And all of that changed when I found out that you could go to college and learn about horses and horse training. So when I entered college as a freshman, I had logged lots and lots of hours riding horses, mostly bareback, but I lacked both in technical skills and in the understanding of theory. For example, I knew that horses loped or cantered and that they had right lead and left lead, and that that right lead and left lead was possible on the front end, the front two legs or the hind legs.

Speaker1:
And if I watch somebody else riding, I could see the front lead. If I tried. And maybe the hind lead, but if I was riding the horse, I could not tell you what lead I was on. So although I was comfortable running a barrel pattern or racing down a trail, I did not have the understanding needed to identify what lead I was on when I was riding. Which also meant that I couldn't decide what lead I wanted to be on, so I couldn't, on cue, pick up my right lead or my left lead. And this is just one example to give you an idea of where I started from. So when I say that I entered college at that level, and then I tell you that I graduated four years later, having fully trained a horse from never been ridden to spinning, sliding and flying lead changes. And I even showed that horse at an NHRA show my senior year. That would be the National Reining Horse Association. So an NHRA show in my senior year, that's a lot that I learned in those four years. So here's what fascinated me about this thought. The first thing is I felt something shift or stir inside of me when I said it. So imagine how you feel when you're excited about something that's coming up, or maybe you're even nervous about something that's coming up and it's a week or two, or a month or two out.

Speaker1:
When you're in that situation, you might be going through your day and you're not actually thinking about that upcoming event, but it might briefly pop into your mind and you'll feel your stomach shift or turn. It was like that in the middle of teaching. I felt that feeling in my body, that shift in me. That's what it feels like when you have a thought that really connects all the way through. You know it because you feel it in your body. So my physical response to what I said was the first indicator to me that I was on to something. And keep in mind, I was in the middle of teaching. So although I wasn't fully aware of why that had caused a reaction in me, and I also didn't have time to stop and ponder it, I did notice the feeling, and I did make a mental note to return to this and figure it out. Now I want to pause for just a moment. If you find yourself in this situation, there are two really common challenges I see. Number one, people often don't notice their own physical responses to things. Number two, many people who may notice a little shift don't take the time to go back and look into it, to go back and to get curious.

Speaker1:
And then I'm going to label this one too.a if you do notice it and you almost think about going back to get curious. So instead of not going back to get curious, it's like you almost head back towards getting curious. But before you even get to curious, like it occurs to you, I wanted to go back and think about that. But many times, right in that moment, people allow doubt or facts to crush the curiosity right out of them. So what I mean by this is maybe you will notice that you're talking to somebody and you will notice that physical response. And then you think, I wonder why I felt that. And then before you even have time to go back to it, an hour or two later, you'll think, ah, it's not really worth it. I'm too busy. That's what I mean by almost getting curious about going back, but dismissing it right at the edge. So watch out for those things. Number one, start paying attention to your body. Number two, If you do notice something and it's not an appropriate time to figure it out, do commit to going back and giving yourself even 15 minutes. Remember, if you choose to entertain an idea, it doesn't mean you have to take action on it. When I took my own advice and when I did go back and look closer at what could have possibly made me have that stirring feeling, I realized several things.

Speaker1:
First, I realized that I really liked the four year time frame comparison. I really specifically liked it because it aligned with another time period in my life, which was college, and there was something about anchoring that comparison of the four years, then to the next four years that really worked in my brain. The second thing I realized when I stopped to look at it was I had no idea how this would be possible. Here's another two. A that's exactly how college was for me. So in the same moment that I realized I have no idea how I'm going to make the next four years contain more learning. This excited me and reminded me that that's exactly how college was. I had no idea what I would look like at the end of four years of an equine college, but I trusted the process and I went all in. So in a way, these goals are very similar. These four year time periods, the 120 plus years ago back in college and the one coming up now could be viewed as very similar. And the final thing that I noticed when I went back and looked at the phrasing was that it leaves me some wiggle room on how this will be accomplished, which again for me is perfect because I like leaving room for the magic to happen. I like the open ended possibility of what more could mean. Even though right now is when I'm really looking at how I might be able to work this into my upcoming plans, I could instantly feel the impact of this thought within the first few days and the first few weeks of having this thought.

Speaker1:
I could feel my mind turning a question over and over again. How could I learn more now than I did in those college years? And it's kind of an open question. How? How could I learn more now? How could I learn more in the next four years than I did those four years of college? And that question kept creeping in and popping up at different times. And I specifically remember one time in particular because I was out ground driving Ember. So this would have been somewhere around mid-summer, like June or July, and the idea was floating around in my mind. I want to learn more in the next four years than I did in my four years in college. And as I'm ground driving her, and I'm wondering how I suddenly knew because in the middle of something very specific, like ground driving and thinking about this, it dawned on me that in order to achieve this, I would have to do things differently. Because just by simple logic, if I do what I've always done, I won't be learning more. I'll be simply repeating what I've done before. So how can I do what I'm doing but do it differently? And here's what I know in this particular case, and in most cases, when I look at something very specific, is when I begin to see the answer.

Speaker1:
So in that moment, while I was ground driving, Amber and I wondered, how can I do what I'm doing but do it differently? All of a sudden there was a flood of answers. Instead of I don't know how I'm going to do this any differently. Suddenly there were all these answers. Like, I could ground drive her for longer than I've ever done before. I could ground drive her for maybe twice as long. So instead of ground driving for, you know, a few weeks, I could ground drive for a few months. I could ground drive with different goals. I could do more complex transitions while I was ground driving. I could ground drive in more locations. I could make subtle changes. For example, I could stop and stand in the middle of ground driving and stand twice as long as I've ever stood before with another horse. So inside the very specific example of ground driving, I could find many ways where I could simply do something I already do and go deeper. Two mistakes I commonly see when people think about how they're going to do more would be rushing or thinking big. When people rush, they tend to think that if they want to do more, that means they've got to go faster, faster, faster, or if they think more must mean different in big ways, they might think something like, well, if I want to learn a lot more and I've always been a Western writer, maybe a lot more means I just need to learn everything that the English world has to offer.

Speaker1:
Now, don't get me wrong, you totally could do that if that's what's calling to you. But you could also ten-x your learning right where you're at by slowing down and looking at the many layers that make up one fragment of something that you already do. What if your greatest learning in 2025 came from slowing down, observing more, and noticing layers that you've not ever even looked at before. In many ways, I'm an expert with horses, so the idea or this concept, I want to learn more in the next four years than I did in my four years in college appears on the surface to be confounding. But now that I've been thinking about this for six months, I actually think the biggest barrier here is the willingness to embrace the idea that I can have both that beginner's mind looking at something new and fresh while also keeping my expert knowledge. So this just makes me remember that there are different types of learning that happens at different stages. So the stage I was at when I entered college is a completely different stage of learning than where I'm at now. And yet now All I can see in more detail than ever before.

Speaker1:
Now I can dance between theories and mix and match techniques in ways that I never could have imagined 20 years ago. What if everything I've done up until now is the springboard for what I'll do in the future? What if this jumping off point leads me somewhere I can't even imagine today? No matter how hard I try to imagine it. I promise, if you had told me in 1997 that I would one day show a horse bareback and bridleless in the freestyle, reining at the Quarter Horse Congress, and I would mark a score higher than anyone had ever marked before. I would have backed away from you slowly and carefully, thinking you had totally lost your mind. At that point, back in 1997, I was already doing more than I had ever dreamed possible. Which just goes to show how limited we can be with our dreaming. If you are interested in figuring out how you can implement what I'm talking about right now for yourself, here are a few things for you to consider. One thing to think about is the time frame. Up until now, I have been asking myself questions that tend to focus around a one year time period, a three year time period, or a five year time period. When I think about goals or directions now, my lifelong one is set that mission statement, one is there and it's a lifelong one. But a lot of times when I set goals or more specific things, I tend to work in one, three, or five year chunks.

Speaker1:
So the question for you is what time period feels right for you? Pick one that feels right for you. And if you don't know, just pick one. Roll some dice. Toss a coin. I only know that four years feels really amazing for me right now, because I've done a lot of one year goals. Three year goals. I do think there's some wisdom in working within a time period, whether that time period is chosen because it reminds you of a time period you worked in when you were at school, a time period you worked at, at a job you knew, or whether you like the actual calendar year of beginning in January and ending in December. There's no wrong way. But pick a time frame that you feel great about looking at. The next thing to think about is what really excites you. Remember earlier in the podcast when I was explaining what I felt in the middle of the call when I said this statement, I had an actual physical reaction that felt like a stirring or a shifting, like excitement or nervousness when I made the made the statement, I want to learn more in the next four years than I did in my four years of college. Begin watching for something like that in yourself. You can do this by journaling or daydreaming.

Speaker1:
I also find simply talking with a friend really works. Start paying attention to your body now. Everything you notice probably won't be positive. You might notice a temptation to dismiss your idea as soon as you have them, but that's still moving forward because now you're at least noticing that. Or you might notice a desire to beat yourself up for past goals that you set and didn't achieve. Right now, when you start considering future goals, these are good things to notice because these are some of the obstacles that you have to work to overcome in order to move forward. One of my amazing, resourceful writer students, Kim, shared an incredible list of things that she that she discovered inside the program doing the work this year. And I'm going to share just a few of them with you here. Here's what Kim wrote. Failing isn't failure. Failing forward provides more information to refine goals and ultimately helps to improve my relationship with my horse. Forgiveness in the form of continuous kindness is a gift my horse and I give each other every time we meet. Goals were made to be broken. I've really only accomplished one thing I planned this year. I learned a lot about my horse and I was reminded I am blessed beyond all I could ask or imagine. New and improved goals. I have no problem being a goal setter, but I learned the art of being a goal refiner while recognizing and resisting the temptation to feel like a failure and saying no thank you to that failure thinking Invitation.

Speaker1:
Information is power. If there's a problem, aside from a health issue, there's a problem in the relationship between my horse and myself. He doesn't trust me. I don't trust him. It's time to improve the relationship. Period. End of story. It's not time to try harder or wing it or hope for the best. It's time to be realistic and to move forward from boring success, not pressure from previously set goals or any external factor. Trust the process. I achieved a lot of goals that weren't even on my list. Even an old donkey can learn new tricks more than I could ask or think. This is only part of what Kim shared. And yes, she also owns a donkey. What I love about Kim's takeaways are how they show that oftentimes the Oftentimes the most important step is picking a direction and heading towards it. I find that especially as adults, we like to imagine that we know how the path will look. And I think it's natural to want this because if we can imagine that, we know exactly how it's going to look, it feels like a form of safety and security. What if you approach your journey in 2025 with both the enthusiasm of a college freshman and the wisdom that you already have? That's what I have for you this week. Thanks for listening, and I'll talk to you again in the next episode.

Speaker2:
If you enjoy listening to Stacy's podcast, please visit Stacy Westfall for articles, videos and tips to help you and your horse succeed.

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