Episode 248: Am I doing this right?



The questions you ask will impact the information you gather and your entire riding experience.

Often times, the question “Am I doing this right” Or “Is this correct?” is a lightly veiled, “Is this wrong?” or “This is probably wrong…” or some variation.

You’ll know by the way it feels in your body.

One way to improve your rate of learning is to ask high-quality questions.
High-quality questions are rarely answered with a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’.
High-quality questions are more specific, and inside answering them, the solution is often revealed.

In this episode I outline when the question, ‘Is this correct?’ might be useful, and I outline clear criteria for when I ask it…and how I answer it.

I also explain why it isn’t a question I ask regularly, and the method of questioning that I find much more effective for increasing awareness and creating change.

Episode 248_ Am I doing this right_.mp3: Audio automatically transcribed by Sonix

Episode 248_ Am I doing this right_.mp3: this mp3 audio file was automatically transcribed by Sonix with the best speech-to-text algorithms. This transcript may contain errors.

Speaker1:
Pick a higher quality question. You'll know it's a higher quality question because as you answer it, it will give you more information.

Speaker2:
Podcasting from a little cabin on a hill. This is the Stacy Westfall podcast. Stacy's goal is simple to teach you to understand why horses do what they do, as well as the action steps for creating clear, confident communication with your horses.

Speaker1:
Hi, I'm Stacy Westfall and I'm here to help you understand, enjoy and successfully train your own horses. In this season of the podcast, I'm answering questions that your mind may offer you when you head out to train your horse. Today's question is a popular one. Am I doing this right? It also comes in other variations, including is this correct? On the surface, it can appear that this question will create learning and progress. But if you want to know if that's true for you, you're going to have to try the question on. So think about the last time that you asked the question, Am I doing this right? Maybe you were taking a lesson or maybe you watched a YouTube video and then headed out to the barn to try something new? And you found yourself wondering, Am I doing this right? It's really important that you have an example in mind because the next step changes depending on what you picture. So here are two of my own examples. I'm thinking back to a time when I was practicing riding dressage tests for memory, and at the end of the ride I remember wondering after my last halt at X, I wonder if I've ridden that pattern correctly. And what I meant by that was did I have all of the movements in the correct order? So the question was that correct was coming from me wondering if I had mixed two different tests together in my mind, because at the time I was memorizing multiple tests.

Speaker1:
And when I think back to that moment right after I halted at X and that thought flashed through my mind, wondering if I'd done that correctly, I can recall a feeling of holding my breath slightly. It felt like something was suspended. It was a slight feeling of doubt. Maybe you could label it unease. Then what I did was I went and watched the recording of my ride and then I either verified that I had been correct, took a deep breath and kind of absorbed, Yes, you did that. Or there were times that when I had that same exact experience, I actually watched the video and realized where I had accidentally put a different part in from a different test. And then I realized, okay, yeah, no, that was not correct. I've got to go try again. What's interesting about this example is that it's easy to see that when I asked the question, was that correct? I was also carrying a level of concern that it was not correct. That's where that doubt or unease was coming from. Confidence would have been this feeling coming from me, knowing that it was correct, even if I learned that it was a little bit different than that. So literally, when I'm asking myself the question, was that correct? I am in a moment of doubt for very clear defined things like riding a dressage test. The question can be easily answered.

Speaker1:
But what I'm pointing out here is do notice that there is tension carried with that question. So have you got your example in mind? When's the last time that you asked the question, Am I doing this correct? So personally for general everyday training. I don't ask myself this question and I aim to teach my students to view their rides from an angle that doesn't encourage this type of thinking because it tends to bring that physical tension with it. Another way to say it is that oftentimes when people ask, Am I doing this correct or is this right? It's a lightly veiled is this wrong? This is probably wrong or some other variation. That's where the doubt is coming from. The way you'll know how this question is impacting you is by the way it feels in your body. In my example, the dressage test, there were times when the question of the pattern being correct felt like it carried more doubt than other times. And then there were other times it felt more like curiosity. But there's one really important thing to remember when you look at that example. I set myself up for success by recording my ride so I could ask the question and answer it. I had a very clear what I wanted to do. I had the video where I could double check. So when I asked that question, it wasn't just hanging in the air forever as an unknown or a vague.

Speaker1:
Did I ride that test? Correct. And then I could hit play and I could find the answer. There were many other days that I would go out and ride practicing for the test. So I would ride pieces and parts of the test or maybe even entire tests. But I didn't set up the camera and I did not ask myself that question because the question did I do that correctly? As in, did I ride the pattern correctly? Did I ride that dressage test, including all the correct movements? I didn't ask myself that question on the days that I was out there riding pieces and parts. Even if I did kind of accidentally ride an entire test, it wasn't my focus. So I didn't ask myself that question. On those days, I was focused on riding corners very cleanly. I was focused on my square halt or my straight lines or really great transitions, and I was not focused on the test at all. So this left me completely free of the tension carried by the question of did I do that correctly? And then when I did want to know if I wanted to be able to ask and answer that question, I set myself up for success by recording the ride so I could answer the question. Now here's where day to day riding could be different. When you are learning to train your horse, you will often be trying new things that won't be as easy to label, correct or incorrect, as what I was doing when I was evaluating my dressage test.

Speaker1:
In that case, I would encourage you not to ask the question. So instead of am I doing this right or is this correct, I would rather have you try on questions like this. Was I able to maintain inside bend on that circle? Was I able to do that transition beside that cone? Was my hand high that time or was I able to keep it down? So when you're training, it's often useful to think about how you could be more effective at communicating with your horse. Is there a way that you could make your communication more clear? So if your body gets tense because you're wondering, am I doing this right? You will be much more likely to block the effectiveness of the technique that you're trying with all that doubt and tension that is created by asking the question. So imagine right now you go out and you're trying a technique and you keep asking, Is this right? Am I doing this right? Is this right? I wonder if I'm doing this right versus this phrase. I'm going to give this a try and I'll see what happens. Can you feel the freedom that comes with, I'm going to give this a try and see what happens. It creates a completely different experience of trying a new technique, and it doesn't change that after you're done giving it a try, you can still evaluate it.

Speaker1:
So let's say that you were doing something and you were trying to get more bend on the circle. You could actually stop and ask yourself, Did I create more bend? If the answer is yes, then great. If the answer is no, then make a theory on why. It could be something as simple as maybe I need to shorten that rein, or maybe I need to add a little bit more leg. Or maybe I need to loosen the other rein, When the horses are moving through training, they need different levels of support on different days. So what is quote unquote right today to create 25 degrees of bend might need to be adjusted tomorrow to create 25 degrees of bend. Every single thing you do with your horse has a built in hierarchy of importance. So as you're doing something as simple as a circle, that implies that you're able to get forward motion, and then on top of that forward motion, you're able to control the direction and then on top of the direction, you're able to control the speed. And then on top of the speed, you're able to control the bend. There's some sort of level of hierarchy of importance as you do everything with your horse. So inside my program, the Resourceful Rider, I teach techniques and patterns. And one thing I've been saying for decades is don't sacrifice the technique to stay on the pattern.

Speaker1:
Another way to say this is run the cones over if you need to as you're figuring out the technique. So I'll say it again. Everything you do with your horse has a hierarchy of importance. I would rather have you stay steady with your hands and learn to preplan and in the meantime, run over the cones. Then to have you jerk the steering wheel, also known as the reins at the last minute so that you don't miss the cone. Do you see where I'm going with this? Once riders have the base cues solid, once they start using their legs more effectively and moving their hands more smoothly and big time preparing ahead of time, once they're doing those things, then I find it beneficial to say, okay, now stay on the pattern, but don't break the rule of jerking the steering wheel at the last minute. Don't correct at the last minute. If you fail to plan ahead, you're driving a semi. Now, this is not a little tiny car. You've got to learn to plan ahead when you're steering this horse. So oftentimes riders fail to see how far ahead they need to plan or navigate. And then at the last minute, they make this sudden correction to stay on pattern. But what they don't see is the horse's experience suffers. So on the surface, it can look like I'm giving conflicting advice. In the beginning I'm like, don't worry about the pattern at all.

Speaker1:
And then I'm saying, okay, now worry about the pattern. But in reality, I'm helping riders build their awareness in stages. But it kind of looks like I'm saying, don't worry about the pattern. So your desire to say, Am I doing this right while you're running over the cone? I could still say yes if you avoided making a sudden jerky movement with your hand. Your technique may have stayed correct. And you still run over the cone because you and your horse just haven't worked out the details of when you need to steer the semi. So the technique could be good, but the planning ahead could be poor. So by having students focus on technique first, it actually helps break the habit of staying on the pattern and then possibly treating the horse in a way that teaches them to become reactive. It gives a criteria that we can use to evaluate. And then when the student gets a better feel for that rein, leg balance while they're doing some of these different things, then riding the pattern challenges the riders to do things in very specific spots. By understanding the order of importance and specifically what we're looking for, it makes it a lot easier to ask specific questions. And it can also help you to experience more positive emotion when riding. If you ask the question, did my horse maintain the correct bend on those circles? You'll look for a different answer than if you ask the question, Did I do that? Correct.

Speaker1:
The first question trains the rider to look for the bend. And the second question is much more likely to feel like a pass or fail a yes or a no. Pay attention to the questions you ask. Are they producing answers that are leading you forward on your path, or are they shutting you down? And the way to find out if the question you're asking is working for you is to listen to your body. If you ask a question and it makes you feel terrible or incapable or inadequate or defeated in just asking, am I doing this correct? Then try asking a better question. I view training horses as building a language between horse and rider. And many of you tell me that you resonate with that idea. Before you improve your communication with your horse, you may need to improve your communication with you. Pay attention to the subtle emotions that are attached to the questions you ask yourself or others. If you notice, like I do, that the question Am I doing this right? Often carries tension. Then pick a higher quality question. You'll know it's a higher quality question because as you answer it, it will give you more information. Am I doing this right? Often triggers people to look for a yes or no response. The more specific questions like Was I able to maintain the correct bend? Will often train you to look at everything that's involved in creating bend.

Speaker1:
Horse training is a beautiful language that deserves to be explained in more detail than yes or no. So learn to ask more specific and clear questions, and if you don't know what you're looking for so you find it difficult to ask specific questions. Find someone with experience to help you take a lesson. Join a program. Audit a clinic. Educate your eye. Look for specific things to watch for in the horse. It could be the way they're carrying their neck or the speed that they're going or what they did in that transition. Did their head go up? Did their head go down? Did their hind legs come under? As you begin to look for more specific things, you'll be able to ask better questions and you'll be able to explore different techniques that people have for achieving that thing, because you're going to find there are many ways to achieve that, which is really great news because that means there's a very good chance that part of what you're doing is working and some of it could probably be adjusted. So the question, Am I doing this right? Is often too vague. Thanks for listening and thank you to everyone who's been emailing in questions. If you would like to send a question, send that to Stacy at Stacy westfall.com and I'll talk to you again in the next episode.

Speaker2:
If you enjoy listening to Stacy's podcast, please visit Stacy westfall.com for articles, videos and tips to help you and your horse succeed.

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